Thursday, September 10, 2009

#27-Whew, will it ever stop

I'm Married!!

We had a very nice, small wedding.
Just family and good friends.
We wanted to focus the day on our
marriage, not the wedding.
Been there done that.

But is a wedding day without a few
bumps in the road.



1. Sick flower girl
I didn't have any attendants except my
niece the flower girl. Brother called at
9 am to let us know that she has been
throwing up since 7 am. I wished them well
and figured I would just go with a flower girl.
But she recoved and did a perfect job.




2. Broken Cake Topper
My mom, in her desire to get everything
organized and put together, placed the cake
topper with the serving set on the edge of the counter.
(Which was covered with everything else for the day)
Shortly after she bumped it and it fell to to floor,
landing with an unmistakable tickling of shattered
porceline.

She was very upset. I tried to calm, said it's no
biggy. I'll run to the mall and see if they have
another one. She went to one mall, and I to another.
She found an identical one and purchased it. No biggy.

3. House stuff
On the way to Portland for the wedding. We got a call
from our lender saying that we didn't qualify for the
home buying assistance program due to moving to
a county with a lower income rate. We now have
to come up with a down payment. We are still
working that out. But we are on track to close soon.

I guess the most important thing is I am married
to a wonderful, supportive, amibitious, handsome,
sexy, loving man. I couldn't ask for more.

Thursday, September 3, 2009

#26-Updates, house, wedding and other issues

Well, it has been a month now.
The weather is a lot cooler.

Oh and by the way, the s**t hit the fan.
The monday after my post.
Our lender lost their licence
to do FHA loans, and we lost the house.

But after some crying, some anger, and
finally acceptace, things turned around.

We found a new lender,
a bigger and better house
and a better interest rate.

Just waiting to close in a couple of weeks.

In the mean time, our wedding is on Saturday.
Most everything is ready, and I am feeling
realtivly calm.

At least I am today.

Had a good cry last night. That always helps
releive my stress.

Started at the bridal shop.
Did my final fitting.
Dress fits well, is a little snugger
then I usually like--but it looks good.

As I was leaving, there were about 5
young women trying on wedding dresses.
The biggest girl was about a size 6.

They all looked young and beautuful.

I wanted to rip their eyes out.

I instantly felt like a huge whale in
a school of rainbow fish.

I have never been lower then a size 12
my whole adult life. Have always been
fighting with my weight.

Went to weight watchers for the first time
when I was 10.

I have a wonderful man who loves me the
way I am, but I just wish I loved myself
more. It seems to be the one part of my
life that I can't get a hold of.

I know that I am a good, moral, decent,
intelligent...bla bla bla

Just wish I was a little skinnier.
Not a size six, but a 12 or 14 might be nice.